Tag Archives: inspiration

HAPPY BIRTHDAY – PRIDE in A.A. on InTheRooms.com Turns 1 Year Old

If you are looking for a place to enhance your recovery online then look no further than InTheRooms.com. InTheRooms (ITR) has every type of recovery group and meeting that an individual could think of. We are proud to now be able to offer a new group called Pride in AA on InTheRooms.com. 

AA for members of the LGBTQ+ community.

Pride In AA closed Alcoholics Anonymous group is dedicated to members of the LGBTQ+ community and their ALLIES. We endeavor to create a feel-safe place where you can be comfortable in sharing, discussing and growing in recovery. It’s a place to share about the disease of alcoholism and how that relates to identification as LGBTQ+ and ALLY community membership. Joining the closed group does not mean you are disclosing that or how you identify. It is just joining a closed group that you feel will help you continue your growth in recovery together with others. We do this together!

A feel-safe place.

When the COVID-19 Pandemic hit we in recovery were hit hard. Face-to-face meetings were shut down and online meetings became front and center in recovery. Prior to the pandemic meetings specifically for LGBTQ+ and ALLIES could be found in pretty much every large city. In fact, a popular search site is Gay and Sober which is an international meeting search site.

While the AA Group on ITR is very inclusive, not all LGBTQ+ individuals feel they are able to truly open up and discuss all aspects of their recovery. For many, their alcoholism, recovery and their identifying as LGBTQ+ are intertwined. It is so important for those who identify as LGBTQ+ or as an ALLY to feel 100% able to be rigorously honest with themselves and others. It is important to discuss their solutions to internalized stigma and not feeling comfortable speaking in open meetings. Lack of familial support is also a reality for many in the LGBTQ+ community and as More About Alcoholism states – we could add to this list ad infinitum.

Where and when?

This group has been meeting on Tuesdays at 9PM EST since May 18th, 2021. If you are in need of a meeting to be you, please go to In The Rooms and become a member. Once there you can click on the Pride in A.A. Group link from this blog and request to join. We hope to see you there. 

If you would like to join the group just search for Pride In AA in the groups option and request to join. If you would like to reach out to us you can by emailing prideinaa2021@gmail.com. We look forward to meeting you at Pride in AA on InTheRooms.com.

That is what’s in “My Rattled Cage”, thanks for stopping by!!

Has it REALLY been over a YEAR?

I was doing a project for my job recently and I wanted to include my blog link on the project. When I went to my blog, I was like “has it REALLY been over a YEAR since I have written anything?” Then to top it all off I could not log into my account. Luckily, I was able to gain access today thanks to what they are now calling Happiness Engineers at WordPress.

I have missed so much in this last year as far as my writing goes. I have missed writing for SoCS. I missed participating in The Bee Writes’ “Love is in Da Blog 2022”. I missed writing in this year’s Blogging from A to Z in April. I have also missed writing for Song Lyric Sunday. I plan to get right back into my writing now that I have access to my account and my blog!!

So much has happened in the last year. Most importantly I recently celebrated 28 months of SOBRIETY. I am still very much involved with InTheRooms doing lots of service work. In April of last year I created the Pride in A.A. Group on In The Rooms and on Tuesday nights I chair the Pride in A.A. meeting at 9pm EST/8pm CST, this meeting started meeting the first week of May of last year.

After Mother’s Day last year I upgraded from my 2020 Mitsubishi Mirage to a 2021 Mitsubishi Outlander. In October I traveled to McDonald, Tennessee to see my father and stepmother and went to Memphis to go to Graceland on my mother’s birthday October 6th. While in Memphis, on the night of October 5th some nice folks in stole the catalytic converter off of my brand new car. Francesca, that is my car’s name, got stuck in Memphis until December 11th when I returned to pick her up. I still finished my travels in a rental Dodge Ram, that was fun since I am not a truck person. My brand new car already has 22,000 miles on it even though it sat in Memphis for a little over two months.

I am still working with my favorite place to be employed, my home away from home, The University of Texas at San Antonio. Cruz and I just celebrated our 21st anniversary in February. We still have 6 dogs – Crissy, Little Bitty, Zailey, Stitchy, Marcy and Lucy.

Other life has happened as well. My brother in law who has been in my life since I was 11 continued fighting his courageous battle with brain cancer. During this battle I was able to be the brother I am supposed to be by traveling back and forth to the Santa Fe, Texas/League City, Texas area to be there for my sister and brother in law and to do whatever I possibly could for them. Unfortunately earlier this year the cancer had metastasized so badly in his liver and other areas that it was determined to stop treatment. That was in February. On April 28th he passed away at the age of 62.

I am truly blessed that I had the wherewithal, courage and determination to get up on January 4, 2020 and say that I was SICK AND TIRED OF BEING SICK AND TIRED, I pray for the last time. Had that not happened I would not have been able to be there for my sister and brother in law. I am so extremely blessed to have the family that I have and my friends and wonderful colleagues.

That is what is in “My Rattled Cage” , thanks for stopping by!!!

Mission Accomplished

So, I can make the OFFICIAL announcement. On February 1st I am returning HOME to my beloved The University of Texas at San Antonio as a Business Service Center Specialist I with the College of Sciences!!!

I cannot even stop expressing how EXCITED and ECSTATIC I am to be returning home.

Everyone knows I bleed ORANGE and BLUE!!!!

That’s what’s in “My Rattled Cage”, thanks for stopping by!!!

A Late #SoCS – Directions

socs-badge-2019-2020

I am running late this week on my #SoCS, but here I am. So Linda gave us the prompt of “directions”.  So I looked at a frozen dinner in my freezer and one of those Yakisoba soups and their directions started with peel back the corner to vent contents.

Peeling back the corner of the box is kind of like peeling back that first layer of an onion. This reminds me of a classic line from Mike Meyers as Shrek to Eddie Murphy as Donkey in the family movie Shrek. “Ogre’s are like onions!”

For me this particular time of recovery from my problems with alcoholism and addiction to cocaine addiction is a reminder that those of us in recovery that are really taking their program seriously are not ogres but they are definitely like onions. As people in recovery we are slowly peeling back those layers until we get to the very core of what we are and why we are alcoholics and addicts. You see as I am moving through my recovery, I am doing things differently. I am beginning to see those 9th Step Promises coming true and I am not even a third of the way through the simple program that is suggested.

Tomorrow I will have four months in recovery and I am truly blessed to have a great sponsor who refuses to let me rest on my laurels. Right now there are no face to face meetings but I am still able to attend meetings with my online home group Global Steps Alcoholics Anonymous that happens to meet in the our church In The Rooms an online recovery place which has so many other recovery program meetings for any addiction that you can imagine. I am working my steps and I am about to embark on my 4thStep which will demand true rigorous honesty on my part.

On my 90th day of recovery I purchased a brand new 2020 Mitsubishi Mirage. I would have never imagined that I would own a brand-new car. I am working a job that pays $10.50 an hour and yet I have no fear of economic insecurity. I am feeling a mental peace that I have never know even during my previous 2 1/2 years of sobriety between February 2014 and September 14th, 2016 when I turned 50 and unfortunately threw that sobriety away and have been struggling through relapses and recoveries over and over again.

In December 2019 my husband of almost 19 years at the time had open heart surgery and I did not handle it well at all. In fact, I wedged his truck in concrete barrier on Christmas Eve when I went out and got drunk – luckily, I was able to have it winched out and I drove it home. But that wasn’t enough. On New Year’s Eve I had no intention of drinking let alone getting drunk because I had to open the Dollar General that I worked at 7AM. Well I did get drunk, did not open the store and then proceeded on a bender due to the shame and remorse. On January second, I returned the keys to the store and as I was leaving, I did wreck my husband’s truck and damaged the right headlight and hood area. Again, going into another bender until the night of January 3rd when I had my last drink.

Next weekend I will be taking a rite of passage and taking a road trip in my brand-new car to Lamar, Missouri where I was born and spent summers and Christmases with my grandparents who are long gone. Sunday is May 10th, and in Mexico every and every so many years including this year is Mother’s Day. I will be going to have a conversation with my mother at her graveside as she passed on Mother’s Day May 10th 1998. But I will also be seeing my grandmothers and grandfathers, my brother and other relatives that have passed over the years. This trip I anticipate will be very cathartic and yes I NEED TO TAKE THIS TRIP, even during this troubling time in America I cannot allow my fears of another health issue to stand in my way of taking down a demon that has been such a huge part of my multiple journeys into relapsing and recovery.

This time I know that if I pick up one drink, I might as well just die because I do have another relapse in me that would be the most horrible of them all, BUT I DO NOT HAVE ANOTHER RECOVERY IN ME!!!!

That’s what’s in My Rattled Cage, thanks for stopping by!!!!

 

 

#AtoZChallenge2020 – You Never Let Go

Y2020

I hate for this year’s #AtoZChallenge2020 to end. Yet, here we are at the letter “Y”. Today I have chosen Jeremy Camp’s You Never Let Go from my Apple Music playlist. You never let go has always been an important reminder when I hear ti because no matter how far I fall into my alcoholism or addiction of cocaine., my Higher Power whom I choose to call God has never let go of me. Have I let go of him, many times. Yet, I always return to my faith and I know He never let’s go!!!!

That’s what’s in  My Rattled Cage, thanks for stopping by!!!

Lyrics

Even though I walk through the valley
Of the shadow of death
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I’m caught in the middle
Of the storms of this life
I won’t turn back, I know You are near
And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?
And oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
Every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go off me, yeah
And I can see a light that is coming
For the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
We’ll live to know You here on the earth
And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?
And oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
Every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go off me, yeah
Yes, I can see a light that is coming
For the heart that holds on
There will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes, oh
Still I will praise You, Lord
Still I will praise You, Lord, oh
Singing, oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storms
Oh no, You never let go
Every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go off me, yeah, oh oh
Singing, oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
Every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go off me, yeah
You never let go off me, oh oh oh
You never let go off me, Lord
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Redman Matthew James / Redman Beth Louise
You Never Let Go lyrics © Worshiptogether.com Songs, Thank You Music Ltd.

#AtoZChallenge2020 – Walk With You

W2020

We are winding down on this year’s #AtoZChallenge2020. My entry for today is one of my most favorite songs from one of my most favorite shows Touched By An Angel. I have chosen Walk With You by the incomparable Della Reese who also starred in the show and did such a wonderful job as Tess.

I hope you enjoy. That’s what’s in My Rattled Cage, thanks for stopping by!!

 

#AtoZChallenge2020 – United We Stand

U2020

The letter “U” is one that is really cool, but there are not as many song titles that do start with the letter “Q”. For today’s entry into #AtoZChallenge2020 I actually do have a great song from the 1970’s. I have chosen Sonny and Cher’s United We Stand. The United States of America has the word UNITED in the country name. In my 53 years I have never seen our country so DIVIDED as it is now. Yes, we have definitely had many decades of different turmoil’s, but during this first term of the current occupant of The White House and now this pandemic has truly shown the horrible true colors of the division in this GREAT country that I live in.

I long for the day when we have a leader that does unite this country and returns us to the status of UNITED to the best of their ability. That’s what’s in  My Rattled Cage, thanks for stopping by!!!!

 

Lyrics
There’s no where in the world that I would rather be
Then with you my love
And there’s nothing in the world that I would rather see
Than you smile my love

For united we stand. Divided we fall
And if our backs should ever be against the wall
We’ll be together, Together, you and I

For united we stand. Divided we fall
And if our backs should ever be against the wall
We’ll be together, Together, you and I
And if the world around you falls apart my love
Then I’ll still be here
And if the going gets too hard along the way
Just you call I’ll hear

For united we stand. Divided we fall
And if our backs should ever be against the wall
We’ll be together, Together, you and I
For united we stand. Divided we fall
And if our backs should ever be against the wall
We’ll be together, Together, you and I

Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: John Goodison / Tony Hiller
United We Stand lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

#AtoZChallenge2020 & #1LinerWeds 4/22/20 – Something Beautiful

I try to run away but you keep pursuing me; I try hiding but you keep uncovering all the pain, all the shame, all the mistakes that I’ve made; then you take me, make me Something beautiful!

This is my favorite line from Anthony Evans’ Something Beautiful. I hope you enjoy this song for #1LinerWeds and #AtoZChallenge2020. That’s what’s in  My Rattled Cage, thanks for stopping by!!